As a newbie, I'm finding writing to be much more difficult than just putting 'pen to paper'. Sometimes, I long for the simplicity of writing on ruled notebook paper, in the cow pasture by the stream. No phones, TV's, dogs, or people to interfere. Just me, my thoughts, and my imagination.
I remember the words flowing easily, no thought of censoring what I was writing. They were my words, my ideas, my stories, and I never gave a moments thought to anything other than would my pencil and paper last or would I have to leave the pasture, and go home for more.
Funny, how when we're younger our inhibitions are so few. They tell me as we age, we lose our inhibitions again, or so I hear. I can't wait.
I must admit, over the years I've had my moments of 'free thinking'. In fact, I can remember a time, not too long ago, I very vocally took the stance of "Screw it" to just about everyone and everything. After they got my hormones straightened out, I returned to being a civil human being, unfortunately inhibitions intact. Damn, I kinda liked being without them.
There is something to be said for being able to say what you mean without fear or hesitation or how others are going to receive it. Kids do it all the time, and we love it. There is nothing we like more, deep down, than unadulterated honesty. At times, truth be known as adults, we probably envy children. "Damn, wish I could have said that, and gotten away with it."
As a writer, it's even harder to get a way with it, especially if you're a newbie. Words spoken can be denied. "I never said that". It is your word against theirs, but words on paper are well, they are there for all to read. Evidence, with your name attached in bold letters.
"What will people think?"; "Are you sure you want to write that?"; "I don't know....."; That doesn't speak to me"; "What you write reflects on you".
And, so it goes.
I still have so much to learn about the skill of writing, I enjoy it, and I will continue on my journey to learn. Whether I achieve the lofty goal of publication, remains to be seen. But, I am quickly, discovering, there are as many different writers, with many different skills, more helpful websites and blogs than I can keep up with, and a world of critics.
Sometimes, one needs to just go back to the cow pasture, and focus on writing.