|English: Father Time and Baby New Year from Frolic & Fun, 1897 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)|
When we're young, we never give a moments notice. We mark our calendars in red, set our smart phones to chime, setting people and things we most treasure aside, all in the pursuit of days of endless busyness. We'll have time tomorrow or the next; it isn't going anywhere.
Only it is, we're just too busy to notice.
One moment you're a twenty something graduate excited about making your mark on the world, or a young bride starting her family.
Then you blink.
Your kids are grown leaving retirement and an empty nest to greet you each day.You notice the crow's feet, greying hair and wonder aloud. Where did all the time go? You protest, But, I feel the same today as I did when ....
Then it happens.
A young cashier or waitress tells you about the senior discount. You catch a glimpse of yourself, the way you favor that left hip or the slowness in your step. Denying the obvious, you work an extra half-hour on the treadmill; schedule a makeover with your hairdresser and shop for a trendy new outfit, trying to hold time at bay. But the god-forsaken neon lights only highlight the age spots, saggy arms, and tits that look wilted rather than perky. The woman in the mirror isn't who you thought she was.
Father Time has left his mark.
The wake-up call begins. Gripped with urgency whether from vanity or fear, you refuse to accept the subtle signs believing a few laser treatments and Botox will turn the clock back.
But, you can't out run Father Time.
Looking in the mirror, I see a woman who doesn't sashay like she used to. Cheating death twice in less than six months tends to change one's perspective. I assumed, when the time came, I would handle these heavy issues with grace and dignity. Now, I'm not so sure. It's hard to feel safe struggling with the changes in my life, with all the things I haven't done or said. I wish I could go back and start over.
All the brave, "I would never's..."uttered I take back.